Runaway Future

24.8.2010

Ode to the man down the hall

— forbes @ 21:35

Oh, polite old man who lives down the hall from me
What in the world has made you so angry?

Heading out for a run, I walked by your door
And heard you yelling that someone was a ‘fucking whore’

I’ve never known you to curse or raise your tone
And I’m not sure if you were talking to someone or on the phone

I would hate to be the one who receives your verbal brunt
Especially when you yelled out ‘suck a cock, cunt!’

I only caught a bit of your rant before I was down the stair
But the little bit I caught was too much for me to hear

You’ve always impressed me, taking your hat off in the lift
But now my opinion of you has taken a sudden shift

When you see me in the hall, you greet me and call me sir
But now I know, under the surface, what foul thoughts stir

17.8.2010

If by Rudyard Kipling

— forbes @ 10:07

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream – and not make dreams your master;
If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ‘em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings – nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And – which is more – you’ll be a Man, my son!

12.8.2010

media (an excerpt)

— forbes @ 22:26

Somehow without anybody really noticing, the news changed from events that affect us – such as major wars and stock market crashes – to stuff that doesn’t affect most of us at all, like athletes slaying their wives.

Governments have figured out how to control the big bone-headed catastrophes that made news in the past. These days, you never hear about a cow kicking over a lantern causing a major metropolitan area to be engulfed in flames. Now, thanks to government regulations, all the cows use flashlights and nobody gets hurt.

Rich guys used to be able to manipulate the stock market and make huge profits at the expense of smaller investors. It was big news when the small investors discovered they’d been screwed. Now there are many safeguards against the small investor ever finding out how much he’s getting screwed. That means the financial news is limited to interviews with bald guys who try to guess why the market moved ten points today. It’s not really “news” in the sense that it has any relevance.

War isn’t as newsworthy as it used to be either. All the big countries with impressive weapons can’t figure out a good reason to point them at each other.

[...]

Social problems are reported as statistics that rise and fall for no apparent reason. The only fun part is watching politicians trying to distribute blame without accidentally using the phrase, “I sure hope you voters are as dumb as you look!”

Economic news is too abstract for the average viewer. It’s hard to be excited about news when you can’t even tell if it’s good news or bad news. The value of the yen is up? Uh-oh, now what do I do?

The occasional serial killer story is interesting, but the likelihood of the serial killer snuffing me personally is so small that it’s hard to get excited about it. Serial killing is a very bad thing, but logically, nine people killed by a serial killer isn’t as bad as ten people who are each killed by a separate killer. Serial-killer stories are the most impressive news we have, and they only sound relevant when they’re taken out of context. That’s the best evidence the news isn’t important anymore.

The other clue that all the important stories are gone is the number of news reports about other news reports. This morning I saw a news story about how a tabloid obtained photos of a crime scene. News about the news gatherers is more interesting than whatever they’re gathering news about. Could anything be less relevant than news about how someone gathered news about a story that wasn’t relevant in the first place?

[...]

I predict that news outlets will try to compensate for the loss of relevant news by focusing on stories that are more shocking and depressing than ever. At least that way they’ll get your attention and sell advertising even if the stories aren’t “news” in the traditional sense.

This will limit the reporting to a few stories per year about famous people who are killing other famous people. And if there are not enough of those stories to sell advertising slots, the media will do the only responsible thing – they will start to kill famous people themselves. Eventually, news people will get caught and got to jail, and that will be the end of traditional news outlets.

[...]

The end of traditional news outlets will not limit people’s access to information. Thanks to the ubiquity of video cameras and the Internet, every citizen will be a reporter. If something happens in your neighbourhood, you’ll tape it, stick it on the Internet with your own commentary, and make it available to the world. Sports commentary and statistics will be generated by fans who enjoy doing it for free. The weather reports will be computer-generated and constantly available by computer, pager, voicemail, and dozens of other sources. All news gathering will be disaggregated.

[...]

People will have access to software that constantly combs the Internet for “small” news that is relevant to the. The software will learn to filter out reports from Induhviduals who constantly post incorrect information. You will still get misleading reports quite often, but that’s no different from today.

Excerpt from The Dilbert Future by Scott Adams

Amazingly enough, originally published in 1997.

26.7.2010

chivalry

— forbes @ 11:40

Today I’m waiting for the elevator with the old guy who calls me ‘sir’ all the time. As we wait, I explain to him that I was almost out the door when I realized that I forgot my office keys. So there’s some idle chitchat about where I work and so on and then he tells me he’s heading to the magazine shop to pick up a copy of the Metro and they put it aside for him so he can keep up on the news. He’s always been a pretty well dressed guy and today he’s got on a shirt and tie and a plaid fedora.

We get in the elevator and sure enough it stops at the next floor and a girl gets in.

As soon as the girl gets in, the old guy takes off his hat. In fact, he does it so quickly and smoothly, that I barely notice. It was like it wasn’t even a conscious effort, not even a habit, but pure instinct. And it was all for little reason as she barely acknowledged either one of us. But still the effort was made.

I wish I had that ingrained in me.

4.7.2010

Musical madness in my city

— forbes @ 19:02

When the Kid Rock concert was first announced for the Halifax Commons, I actually had typed up a draft of a “Things that make me shake my head” post about it. The reason being that four or five years ago, Kid Rock was booked to play the Metro Centre (a venue of about 10 000) and that show ended up being cancelled due to “scheduling difficulties” (re: poor ticket sales). Over the last five years, it’s near impossible to say that somehow Kid Rock has become a more popular or more relevant artist (we’re now 12 years away from the days of Bawitdaba) and yet in mind-boggingly stroke of wisdom, it was felt he (along with Counting Crows and Tonic) would be able to draw 40 thousand or so on the Halifax Commons.

Needless to say, the concert was cancelled last week, again due to scheduling difficulties (although rumours persist that Harold McKay of Power Promotional Events personally called everyone who bought tickets to the show to inform them of the cancellation and that gracious act nearly took up most of his morning). The Black Eyed Peas/Weezer show scheduled for the next day is still a go.

But this again stirs a question that’s been jumping around in my head for a while now. The way the bookings of these large scale shows and other events are being handled. The attitude is that we, the citizens of Halifax, should be thanking our lucky stars that artists of this caliber would even be willing to grace us with their presence and thus we should be more than willing to pay out of the nose to experience them. Moreso, even if we don’t like the artists in question, we should support the effort, or failing that, hold our tongues, for fear that no one will ever look our way again.

We’re told that it’s our fault that these shows fail, not the fault of the promoter for booking shows that don’t interest the intended audience. And then it is our fault if more enticing acts don’t come here because we’ve never supported the overpriced crap that was forced down our throats previously. Like petulant children, we’re getting what we “deserve”, in this case, Kid Rock instead of Iron Maiden or Bruce Springsteen.

It’s an opinion that has been forced upon us since the Celine Dion fiasco three years ago and it extends farther than just music.

A lot of the events we see here in Halifax are overpriced and watered down. We get NHL exhibition games for 70 bucks a pop or more, see half the roster that might actually play meaningful hockey during the regular season and fill the place. Meanwhile, to see a legit game in an NHL market (even in a Canadian city like Calgary) is often 15 bucks cheaper or more. And then we get teased with the idea of Halifax one day being a place for NHL expansion because we’re stupid enough to blow our loads (and our wallets) once a year to see the players we watch on television play with guaranteed roster-spot in hand and half-assed effort among a bunch of rookies and has-beens.

The same goes for other sporting events. In June, there was supposed to be an MMA event held at the Metro Centre with a few former UFC fighters. The cost was high, the ticket sales were low and so the event was cancelled.

It comes off as feeling like we’re being gouged. And thankfully, it appears that we’re starting to realise it and get smarter with our money. I don’t want to see an end to NHL exhibition games at the Metro Centre, nor do I want an end to large concerts in the city, but some common sense and care needs to be taken.

Going back to Kid Rock again, this should (rightfully) open up the debate on the use of the Halifax Commons as a concert space. But it won’t.

An act like Kid Rock and the Counting Crows had, at best, a reasonably slim chance at drawing a crowd around 20 to 25 thousand people. That’s probably counting free tickets, comped tickets and the two-for-one packages and such with the Black Eyed Peas show. And judging from the final report on the Paul McCartney concert last year, that number of freebies and comp tickets is astronomical (thus rising ticket prices for later events and also forcing tax payers to cover the cost of the concert regardless of whether they attended or not). I think the final number for Paul McCartney was that every HRM tax payer had $33 of their dollars go to Sir Paul and his show.

Now those numbers should not merit a Commons berth. Prior to the Rolling Stones show five years ago, the outdoor concert venue in Halifax was the Garrison Grounds, a natural amphitheatre near the Commons that can hold 25-30 thousand people. It has hosted many events and continues to do so (including the ill-fated Virgin Fest last year and The Queen’s arrival this year). But it has fallen out of favour with HRM/Events Halifax/Power Promotional.

Some say it’s the problem with dealing with Parks Canada and the desire for HRM to see events that they sponsor held on their own property (thus using their own workers and so on). But part of it has to come back to the idea of gouging the ticket buyers.

For these events, there’s varying levels of VIP tickets as one would expect. For a higher price, you get seats, closer to the stage, food, etc. But in order to make that inordinate expense somewhat justified, you need to make it appear to have value. The natural amphitheatre of the Garrison Grounds prevents this a bit, because for things like concerts, everyone has a pretty good seat (aka, spot on the grass). It makes it excellent for the concert goer, but not for the ticket seller. It’s better to force people onto flat ground, with bleachers, so that those who buy the bare bones package are stuck looking at the back of the head of the guy in front of them and those who really want to see the show shell out even more money to sit in the bleachers (which of course would be redundant (and thus not an option to offer to the VIP ticket holders) in an natural amphitheatre setup like the Garrison Grounds).

And all that is asked of us, the residents of Halifax, is to bend over, hum a tune and take it.

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